I'm sitting on the front porch of my host mom's house listening to the "Michigan" album by Sufjan Stevens. It's been five days, but it feels like a year has passed already. Time passes differently here. When I studied abroad in South Africa in 2015, I found this to be true, as well. Things move slower, the sense of urgency disappears, and while I've had quite the to-do list I find myself with more time dedicated to building relationships, instead of simply accomplishing tasks. 

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In one week, I'll be in Panamá.

What a bizarre thought. Yesterday, I was on a ski lift and flinging myself down snowy slopes in Belmont, MI; making plans to lace up my ice skates to make myself dizzy with cold air and toe-loops; and going on wintery walks through the park by my house, shooting a roll of film of my favorite spots in my neighborhood. I spent yesterday focusing on doing so many things that I wouldn't get to do in Panamá, and didn't realize that I was looking at my departure in entirely the wrong way. 

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T-minus 29 days to departure, and the nerves are slowly disappearing, excitement and confidence taking their place.

For the last five months, I've felt every emotion possible about my decision to embark upon the journey of serving in the Peace Corps. Most days, I couldn't even put it into words. It was never a question of, "Is this what I really want?" or "Am I making the right choice?" It was mainly a question of, "Am I actually going to make it to Panama?" To be honest, I'm still not sure, but I've learned to be okay with it. 

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